Earlier this week my 3½-year-old daughter threw a morning tantrum that almost caused us to miss school. So this morning, Daddy checked on her before we left:
“T’as été sage?” (Were you good?)
“Oui, papa.”
She turns to me: “Mama, ich war doch lieb, oder?” (Mommy, I was good, wasn’t I?)

A few days after our skate at the City Hall skating rink’s children’s rink last Sunday, where gloves are compulsory, we again watched figure skating in the Olympics, a male skater’s short program.
She watched a while, then asked. “Why doesn’t he wear gloves?”

Last Sunday afternoon, we went ice skating at the City Hall skate rink’s children’s rink:

That evening at home, we watched the highlights of the day at the Olympics, figure skating among them. She watched wide-eyed, then said: “I can’t do that!”

Today, my daughter had a chocolate for dessert and afterwards, tried to put the ribbon back around the chocolate box. It’s a very tight ribbon, but yesterday she succeeded. Today, after quite some struggling, she declared:

“Für die große Schule muss man schreiben, vorlesen und Schokolade essen, und dann wieder zumachen.”

“At the big [elementary] school, you write, read and eat chocolate and then close [the box] again.”

Clearly, big school is for the hard stuff.

The other day my daughter melted into tears on the métro. The incident prompted me to ask the advice of a friend, mother of four and “second mom” to many more. I described to her similar situations at home where my daughter would not react to me asking her “What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” and cry even louder when I tried to touch/comfort her. Daddy, however (when present), managed to not only “get through” to her but also to obtain a reply – mostly something extremely trivial.
This prompted my friend to suggest a language problem as the source, namely the lack of words in Mommy’s (minority) language to express her woes.

I was surprised at first since my daughter usually has no trouble expressing herself in German, and when she lacks a word she replaces it with a French one, as shows the last example in this recent post. But then I remembered the trouble I have when I’m very tired and get a technical translation on my desk. So maybe she is really lost for words in the right language and gets frustrated?

This morning I took her to the day-care before school. There she said “Ich will was trinken” (I want something to drink). I told her I didn’t have anything with me and she’d have to ask the day-care people. She asked “Mama, was sag ich?” (Mommy, what do I say?) I suggested “J’ai soif” (I’m thirsty) and she ran off to ask.
Seems this morning she “lost” her other language for a change. 😉

Today when Daddy picked up our daughter from school, she complained he hadn’t left the Christmas lights on at home. When they switched them on, she asked “How does Mommy say that?” Dad’s German is rudimentary (but improving), and he suggested “ausstellen” which she understood as “anstellen”, and she told him: “Non, ça c’est pour mettre quelque chose.” – “No, that’s for turning something on.” [The TV for instance, or the radio, but not lights.]
Correct word would have been “anschalten”, by the way.

This morning, my daughter (3½) told me excitedly she was going out with Daddy. “Where are you going?” I asked. She ran to her father to ask, and I heard his reply: “Au magasin de bricolage et au manège.” My daughter related to me: “Magasin de bricolage und Karussell!”
Shows that the unimportant stuff (home improvement store) doesn’t make it into her (German) vocabulary as quickly as the important stuff (carousel). 🙂

Four years ago today, on New Year’s Eve, I was on the métro going home when I overheard a mother speaking English to her preteen/teenage children, who replied in French. I couldn’t help it, I approached her and asked about languages in her family. It turned out they were a British family living in Normandy. The children went to French school and understood English well but refused to speak it.

Incidentally, yesterday I came across the website http://www.be-bilingual.net/ and the author’s e-book of the same name. Like me, she is a mom in a bilingual family who worried a lot and asked a lot of questions on bilingualism, and like me she wrote her thesis on the subject (though with a lot more practical research).

The point I’m trying to make is that when you are a parent in a bilingual family, and especially when you are the minority language parent, it is important to remember that you are not alone out there. There are many people like Annika of Be Bilingual and Adam of Bilingual Monkeys (http://bilingualmonkeys.com/) and they are doing the same thing you do – raise their children with two (or more) languages.

Happy New Year to all!

These days, I often find myself running for a pen and paper. Any pen and (virtually) any paper will do because the main thing is to write down as quickly as possible what my daughter (3½) just said.
Why? Because half a minute later I will only remember what she said, but not how she said it.
You’ll tell me that’s a problem every parent has who wants to record their offspring’s quotes. But when you’re on the hunt for bilingual quotes, it’s especially important to be accurate, as the way your child uses and mixes (or not) her languages will evolve over time.
Here are some recent examples to illustrate what I mean:

During breakfast: „Je vais couper ein bisschen was ab.“

Playing alone and talking to herself and her toys: „Macht nichts. On kann nochmal machen.“

She says something and I answer, but she was talking to Daddy: „Ich hab doch nicht parlé mit du, ich hab parlé mit Papa.“

(French words in italics.)

In case there has been a doubt about my daughter’s nationality, and based on these words of wisdom, here is final proof: